Vodka/Magners/Beer scooter still works in Inverness

I just about remembered the way back to my mum’s.

I’ve never had to sneak in with two giggling girls before with the four bestest guard dogs in the neighbourhood. We have only ever had one dog and it was possible to sneak past Tara in the wee hours. My poor mum. No wonder she still calls me the bairn. So we bounce off the walls without a hope in hell of not waking up the entire street and make it to our bedroom.

“Oh my sock, great, I wondered where it had gone” as I swan dived down to pick it up of the floor on the way in. One of the puppies must have stolen it and then dropped it again.

Wrong.

I was now very pissed standing in our bedroom at 330 am with a handful of white dog sick full of grass. My sock was still lost.

SQ & Yvie went into such hysterics I thought SQ was going to have an asthma attack. Once I washed it off without physically throwing up myself I thought the spasms of giggles would never stop.

It was like a stoned giggle fit without the hash.

Pure dead brilliant. No way of telling which one of them did it so no 8 inch wee ass to kick. I guess you had to be there.

My poor mum must have thought she would never get to sleep, we must have talked bollox and giggled for another hour.